All Buddhist sects agree that the oasis exists and how to access it. But from there they differ in the sense that for some the objective is to get to the oasis and then to stay there. For others the oasis is there but we shouldn’t enter it until everyone can enter it. Then there’s belief that while the oasis is there Buddha was wrong to point to the oasis/ he wasn’t actually pointing to the oasis. Additionally, when the alternative is so successful it becomes the mainstream it's suddenly got repsonsibilties it didn't previously

Then there’s Taoism - Chinese Buddhism - which teaches there’s many oasis’s but what is our oasis, or oasis’s, depends on us - we’re all different. Additionally, one is not better than another - it’s all subjective - and there’s no obligation to stay in the same one even if it is very pleasant. They’re just different cocktails with the ultimate objective being pouring our own. This one is pleasant but if it stops being, or we just feel like a change, we can pour it out and pour in some different flavours. Taoism is rarely understood by binary western brains as it simply doesn’t make sense to them therefore the ‘Taoism’ most read about isn’t Taoism. Alan Watts ‘got’ it, and no doubt some others also, but typically no.

Most ‘Taoists’ have never heard of Taoism as it’s just a certain mentality, or relationship with reality. There’s no ‘right’ Taoism, no specific objective beyond enjoying this life thing they’re currently experiencing.

Nowadays what is called the Sigma Personality approximates Taoism although the ‘Sigma personality typically only appears when their mainstream path is no longer fit for service. If the mainstream path is subpar of what use are the beliefs and values that would put them on that mainstream path? Thus they unsubscribe from the dominate hierarchy, they don’t seek status as others do and instead put their time, focus and energy elsewhere. They play the game differently as they’re not limited to the cultural template.

When you can make your own rules, it’s hard to lose.

I quote Springsteen a lot and his perspective is defininitly Taoist although he may not of ever heard of Taoism.

While this is obvious, our modern societies are not structured to easily allow us to do this process.

I’m quoting Springsteen a lot because he’s a lot further along the spectrum than most are. Indeed, he’s an extreme example but it’s via the extremes we can more clearly see the different type of mentality.

Known as ‘The Boss’ because he’s in control of himself - got his fingers on his own buttons. A billionaire, famous, happy family and spending his time doing exactly what he wants he’s a success by almost anyones definition. As he said to his audience a few years ago; ‘I haven’t worked a day in my life - thanks’ and ‘If you got to have a problem then too much $$ is a good problem to have, I guess’ Very high level stuff, he obviously figured out this life thing a long time ago. Critically, he’s extremely humble and hopefully why this characteristic is so critical is clear. Obviously, he's worked as in being productive - put food on the table. It's that if we're doing what we want to be doing then it's not experienced as work. There's no conflict and the $$ and fame is a by product, not the focus. Indeed, the fame is mostly unwanted and, if he had his time again, he'd likely keep himself under the radar more.

However, and relevant here, it's not like he, or nearly anyone else, hasn't had their ups and downs. It’s not that those that make their way through the maze to a high level of happiness didn’t find themselves down blind alleys now and again, not that they didn’t get caught in the ‘rat traps’, its that they found their way out and they found their way out by taking responsibility for their decisions thus reality. If we take responsibility for our decisions we’re taking responsibility for our objectives therefore our motivations. Using Springsteen as an example, never in his lyrics, or in his interviews, does he ever blame anyone else. Ok, he makes an exception for Trump, but as Trump is the polar opposite of Springsteen - egotistical vs humble - perhaps he can’t help but be disgusted. He doesn’t blame anyone else because that’s just stupid; why do others need to be as he wants them to be? A lion does as a lion does, a tree does as a tree does, Pete does as Pete does. If we have expectations/ wants from Pete then those are our expectations/motivations. Why does Pete need to dance to someone else’s tune? It’s not reality, beyond extremes, that generates our pain, it’s our expectations of reality and those are our expectations, our wants, our motivations. We’re programmed up to believe this is good, and that bad, ok so dance accordingly, but what does those notions floating in our head have to do with other adults? This extreme live and let live mentality bestows abundant flexibility and a realistic pragmatic relationship with reality as it just is as it is, or at least as it seems to be given our species mediocre array of senses and primate brain.

I exist and experience for a time. Cool, so what do I want to experience and how do I access those experiences? Such, at least from his perspective, is the game of life. Nice and simple. As the environment is one big buffet - everything exists - and we can't eat from all plates, we have to prioritise. There's a lot that tastes pleasant and a lot that tastes unpleasant and our tastes/motivations are also changeable to a degree. Now the game is getting a bit more complicated but, obviously, we have to firstly clarify what we actually want so we're not sprinting towards a mirage. We don't want to be spending our time charging the matadors cape - that's not much fun - so we want to zoom out, zoom in, have different perspectives before we choose the path we spend our lives on. We have to put the set menu down first and if we never do we can pay a high price.

The price

That there's us within the reality that has everything we want means there's no lack out there. It's all there so the rest is up to us. If we can't build ourselves a happy reality whose fault is that? If we're adults, how is it anyone else's fault? They're just doing as they do and if we get involved with someone that causes us pain then we should of known better and if we didn't, if we lacked that relevant knowledge, whose fault is that? Apes be Apes, if we're expecting something different any pain is self inflicted. Homo Sapiens do as Homo Sapiens do. Where's the problem?

Springsteens first marriage, for example, failed. But, as the below lyrics about that relationship illustrates, he takes responsibility. She didn't force him at gun point to get into a relationship with her, he made those decisions and if his decisions delivered pain instead of the happiness he expected then whose fault is that? If he lacked clarity, whose fault is that? Maybe he should of spent a bit more time learning about his own species, thus himself and her, and he would of had more clarity. But, and the point is; he backed up, he returned to his core to recalibrate to what it was he actually wanted. Many refuse to do this, lack the flexibility and humility to do this, and instead blame others, blame the universe as if the universe should be as they want it to be. They're so deep into their version of beliefs and values they can't step out of them, can't stop trying to obtain happiness by being good and right. They're mistaking those pats on the head with happiness.

Now look at me, baby
Struggling to do everything right
And then it all falls apart
Oh, when out go the lights

Now, you play the loving woman
I'll play the faithful man
But just don't look too close
Into the palm of my hand

We stood at the altar
The gypsy swore our future was bright
But come the wee-wee hours
Well maybe, baby, the gypsy lied

So when you look at me
You better look hard and look twice
Is that me,
Or just a brilliant disguise?

Tonight our bed is cold
I'm lost in darkness without love
God have mercy on the man
Who doubts what he's sure of

Our reality is shaped by our actions. Our decisions determine our actions, our objectives determine our decisions and our motivations, and the balance of power between them, determine our objectives. Motivations - objectives - decisions -actions -reality. If our reality is pleasant enough, and that seems sustainable, then there's nothing to change. Happy days. If it's not adequate then we need to change our actions - keep doing the same things and we'll get the same outcomes. We can engage battle midstream - motivations vs motivations - and fight against the current or we can go upstream, make the changes there and let the current do the rest. Either way, or no way, we're responsible for our own reality and if we're not, who is?

Some folks are born into a good life
Others get it anyway, anyhow
Me? well I lost my money and I lost my wife
But them things don't seem to matter much to me now

Tonight I'm on this hill, I can't stop
I'm on this hill with everything I got
Where lives are on the line, where dreams are found and lost
I got here on time and I'll pay the cost
For wanting things that can only be found
In the darkness on the edge of town
In the darkness on the edge of town

Well, everybody's got a secret
Something that they just can't face
Some folks spend their whole lives trying to keep it
They carry it with them every step that they take

'Til someday they just cut it loose
Cut it loose or let it drag 'em down
Where no one asks any questions
Or looks too long in your face
In the darkness on the edge of town
In the darkness on the edge of town

To install the fresh and useful we firstly need to uninstall the useless, second hand programming and make space. Obvious.

Remember all the movies we'd go see
Trying to learn how to walk like the heroes
We thought we had to be
Well after all this time
To find we're just like all the rest
Stranded in the park
And forced to confess to

Hiding on the backstreets
Just hiding on these backstreets With a love gone hard and filled with defeat
Running for our lives on them backstreets

Endless juke joints and Valentino drag
Dancers scrap the tears
Up off streets dressed down in rags
Running into the dark
Some hurt bad some really dying
At night sometimes it seemed
You could hear the whole damn city crying

Blame it on the lies that fooled us
Blame it on the truth that ran us down
You can blame it all on me
Cause none of that matters to me now

Beyond extremes, what matters is what we believe matters. We have beliefs, not the truth so we might as well have our beliefs calibrated to reality as well as we can if we need to navigate reality to get from 'A', where we are, to 'B', where we want to be. If we're continually navigating around what only exists in our brain and bumping into what exists, but we refuse to accept, we're going to struggle to get to 'B'. Ideology- fixed, rigid, and generally scientifically dubious, beliefs - are not our friend. As I wrote a few decades ago;

Ideology is a porcupine, an ugly animal indeed If one you own, set it free, allow it to roam Should it return, hug it but warily For the more you squeeze, the more you will bleed.

Again though, groups need ideals. Accepting we're just relatively intelligent Apes obviously pushes against those ideals thus the interests of the group and ultimately, in the past at least, the individual. Sure, and if our group is healthy and happy, if we're all doing fine then the groups beliefs and values are fine and shouldn't be tampered with. Darwin actually sat on his evolutionary model for years struggling with exactly this dilemma and it was only when others had independently come to the same conclusion, and were about to publish, that he did. However, it would seem that in some societies the culture has already splintered into many sub cultures each with their own hierarchy/ set of beliefs and values. It would seem some mainstream paths are not worth much these days, so what are we protecting? Would seem individuals have to save themselves as there is no cavalry saddling up to come save us. Indeed, this is why we see the rise of the 'Sigma personality' which is essentially Taoism - Chinese Buddhism. What good are the rules if it's increasingly impossible to win by following them? Why scramble up a hierarchy that doesn't have much worth having up there? Better to forget about status, stop needing pats on the head, distinguish between whats just a mirage and what's an actual oasis.